Scarlet on the Couch

Sorry. I'm not dead... I don't know where I was this past week... It feels like longer than it's been.

I had a weird thing with J again, but, I dunno I had my show on Tuesday and I got myself rocked on Vicodin and kind of remained that way until this morning.

Now I'm at Paul's house and I want to cry, I just, I don't like him, I don't like the way he talks to me, it's not rude or mean it's just like I don't know I feel like a courtesan, that's kind of what I'm being but it pisses me off there's only so much I can close my eyes and think about JJ when he feels nothing like JJ and I'm just up here in these new clothes and we're about to go to a party and I feel like the world is wobbling.

I'm definitely going to write more later. And read. I have to catch up with myself.