Thursday, July 22, 2010

time to f'n split

my magical ex's kitty had ktrz.

that's one of 'em. looks like a real piglet. i wish i could see in person.

you know i'm thinking of moving back there.

you know i'm thinking it ain't working out here.

you know i'm thinking this has been one headtrip, timewarp, isolationtank, experiment... i've learned things and it's a dead end and there's naught but mirrored walls on every side, and i don't like my reflection in any of them. i can't make it out here.

thought myself the exception to the rule, accepting the fact that i ain't.

i can't afford this lifestyle. NO LOVE. NO LOVE. NO HELP. NO DIRECTION.

doggypaddling to keep afloat in a stagnant pool. not swimming to. not swimming from. tired already. cold. shivering. still, sick as a dog. and arguing with a sign that says "i'm a fucking idiot" all the livelong day. OUTTA HERE.

time to f'in split me-thinks. time to f'in split.


  1. Oh Scarlet... I wish I could make it all better. I'm so sorry... I hope things work out and that you feel better. Staying where it hurts is no fun. Please, please, please... take care yourself.

  2. oh no.
    it's funny. i want to move. but for the complete opposite reason as you.
    i'm too comfortable. i wish i was as brave as you to go out there and and give it a go. i so admire you.

    you need to beat this sickness. it's getting you down.


  3. Phoenix- yeah, staying where it hurts is not fun. and not smart. and probably not self-caring so...

    K- oh bravery is a synonym from stupidity and giving it a go is overrated... its misguided values.. what do you mean by this sickness though... like depression?